Tuesday, December 11, 2012

Quitting cold turkey

   I had this brilliant plan to quite Paxil...cold, frozen, turkey. Why? Well, I didn't want to refill my prescription and I really want to be done with it! And I'm sure a small ounce of insanity comes into play. It hasn't been the easiest thing, I swear I could quit smoking smelly old cigarettes easier! 

   I know you're supposed to ween yourself off over time, and even though the side effects are less sever, they're just there for longer. The odd thing is that my side effects are nothing like the ones most people seem to experience. Could it be because I'm sans colon? Ya know, for an organ I can live without, it seems to have a large effect on the way my body works. Last night, for example, one minute I was knitting and the next, it's 6 hours later and I have no idea how or when I fell asleep. Normally I wouldn't mind, but I was sitting with the boo boo, and I really hope I didn't frighten her. 

   Yeah, I know I'm kind of rambling. One of the more interesting side effects it total lack of concentration and a "fuzzy" brain. That's all my already over worked brain needs...

Sunday, December 9, 2012

It's been a while...

and I wish my first post in months could be a happier one. Sorry, folks, not today.

    Ask anyone who knows me, I try and stay as upbeat as possible. It doesn't help my disease to be melancholy all the time. But this past week hasn't been a good one for me. Between pain, sleepless nights, and lovely surprises in my pj's for several nights, it's wearing. Not to mention that I have no energy, and the simplest tasks leave me feeling pants and bed ridden all day. I don't know if it's the weather, after all, the Midwest is the land of no sunshine in the winter, or that I haven't left the house very much, or all the Christmas presents I'm knitting aren't turning out the way I want, or the fact that I really want to reach out and help others with IBD, but every effort has been denied, I'm trying my hardest to not be down in the dumps. Yes, that pun was intended. I usually try and keep outside frustrations away from my disease frustrations, but this time, it seems as if it's all just blending together and I feel trapped.

   Don't get me wrong, I'm not shuffling around the house in my robe and slippers, muttering things to myself. Okay, I'm not wearing a robe, but all the rest is just normal for me. It's just that my frame of mind is a little shadowed.

   I will say one thing, I am going to try and start writing on here regularly. I just don't like "blogs". For the most part, they're just people talking about themselves and not really contributing anything worthwhile...forgive my snarkiness, I'm just not Suzie Sunshine today.